It's not me, it's you...

I used to firmly believe that, if it weren't for other people, I would be just fine.  Parents, husbands, friends, bosses - they all existed for the singular reason of putting me down, making me less-than, hurting me.  Okay, kind of self-centered.  Yeah.  Therapy helped me see the wounds, and lordy, if I was anything, it was wounded.  Then came recovery, and the focus became MY PART.  Not sure I liked that part of the Program.  Who was I if not a victim of the very universe I inhabited?  And that became the most empowering place to stand in my consciousness, knowing that  if I look down and see that I am standing in a pile of shit, it didn't crawl up there by itself.  I stepped in it.  Again.  The empowering part is, that if I have a part in the problem, I have a part in the solution, too.  I can sweep up my side of the street, and decide if I want further engagement at that address or not.  I can talk my alternatives over with others.  And I can take steps, either to leave or begin again at a new level of understanding.  Unfortunately, there are some folks that I don't feel I can walk away from.  Like my family - my remaining parent, my siblings, my children.  There, I use all my practices - acceptance, kindness, restraint of tongue and pen, compassion, detachment.  That last one is a must for me.  I cannot fix anyone else, though, God knows, I would if I could.  Hell, I couldn't even fix myself.  I had to rely on my community of fellow AAs and a loving Higher Power to just get sober.  So, Higher Power and I are praying for those other folks out there, the one I am not in charge of, any more.  Huge relief.