Changing woman here....

Ah, therapy!   How vast are your revelations.  This week I had a breakthrough.  Now, it was just the tiniest of shifts, like a piece of a giant puzzle dropping into place.  While discussing my very unhappy and angry mother, I said "that's not my fault".  Now, I have known this for decades, that it isn't me that is my mother's problem, it's her.  But at that moment in time, it fell from my ivory tower of a mind into my mushy little heart, and I knew it with my whole being.  What a relief!  And that only took 69 years!  What can I say, I am a broken person.  No matter how healthy I get in mind and body, I will always limp.  There are scars and wounds still only thinly scabbed over.  I spent most of my life fleeing them, with alcohol, with men, with (and this is my favorite) shopping.  Now I am rolling around in them, getting the mess all over me, hoping they will settle down and give the rest of my life, whatever that may be, some peace.  So I got up today and had a piece of apple pie with sliced almonds and a mountain of whipped cream for breakfast.  I have resigned from the Kate Moss look-alike contest and am happily fluffy.  WYSIWYG woman - what you see is what  you get.  Love it or leave it.  I no longer want to leave.  I am working on loving every poochy inch.